Forgiveness and Your Health

As a family physician, I see many people with illnesses and diseases, some acute and some chronic, but recently there have been more complaints of stress, depression, low mood, tiredness, anxiety and a general slowing down of the physical and mental spirit. A physician always wants their patients to get better, known as the ‘doctors’ agenda’, but the journey of understanding ailments, investigating, diagnosing and treating in a purely medical realm is ineffective and unsatisfactory for many patients. Modern life itself is a great stressor. Investigations often show normal physiology leaves us none the wiser about underlying causes for such symptoms.

A holistic approach, addressing both the mind and the body, is the cornerstone of management in General Practice. And this should include advocating the practice of a simple technique – Forgiveness. Recently, there has been plenty of research into this simple human act of kindness, studies have found forgiving others who have caused hurt, sadness, anger, disappointment or physical pain improves sleep, reduces blood pressure, and reduces risk of heart attack, anxiety, depression and stress.

Psychologists and physiologists have for a long time known about the relationship between chronic anger and disappointment with high cortisol and adrenaline levels, stimulating long term fight or flight mode, resulting in changes in blood pressure, heart rate and immune response. This is sometimes like a post-traumatic stress reaction, although there is nothing physical to fight or flight from. These increase the risk of depression, diabetes and heart disease among others and the act of forgiveness cuts off the toxic connection, inducing calm and improving health.

Forgiving is an art – easier for some and more time taking for others - it is a conscious decision to let go, to never allow someone else to annoy or inflict emotional pain, maybe even offer compassion or empathy to the person who caused the initial offence. It may be once in a lifetime or multiple times, but one study has found that people whose forgiveness came in part from understanding that no one is perfect were able to resume a normal relationship, even if there was no reciprocal apology. The study found that trying to save a relationship without genuinely forgiving led to worse outcomes.

Forgiving can be writing your thoughts in a journal when you cannot speak to the other party, writing this as a private thought in your mind or literally facing the other person and forgiving them. Practicing the art of no expectations and walking away with a complete break can be hard but maybe better than the strongest antidepressant. A study in the UK and Ireland showed evidence that forgiving reduced nightmares, insomnia, angry outbursts, emotional numbness and physical tiredness.

Some of the research in improving emotional and physical health by practicing forgiveness has come from renowned hospitals like Harvard and the Johns Hopkins, making it worth embracing.

Castle Medical Centre has trained clinicians and counsellors to support you and your physical and mental wellbeing, so please contact us if you need to.

Dr Suparna Behura FRCGP
Partner and Trainer

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