TV Super Critic by Bob Garlick

I missed the last issue of Your Call as I wasn’t feeling very well, to put it mildly.

Hospitalised again at the beginning of February, I was given some treatment which, they said, ‘Will make you feel very tired.’ Tired? I missed February, March and the first couple of weeks of April! Now I am gradually getting back into the world, I thought what can I write about? I started to watch a bit of TV and I realised that I was now a lot more choosy than I used to be. Or are the programmes getting rubbishy? I am not talking about the satellite programmes.

Let’s take The Durrells, hailed as a very popular programme. I watched the very first episode and when the mother told the oversexed daughter that the family were going to live in Corfu, the daughter said I must pack my bikini. Bikini? This is supposed to be the mid-1930s, I think. The term ‘bikini’ was used to describe a new style of two-piece bathing suit in 1946, so named after the atomic bomb testing on Bikini Atoll after World War ll. That’s me out then.

Years ago, I used to watch soaps, Coronation Street with Ena Sharples, Eastenders wiv the Mitchell bruvvers, and Emmerdale Farm. Then I realised that I was spending three hours every week watching these. Now they are on almost twice daily and repeated as well! So, I am well out of them.

Talent shows, with all the flashing lights and glitter, I don’t watch any of those. I confess to watching Casualty, I must have this thing about hospitals. We watch it every week and at the end of each episode we usually say, ‘What a load of rubbish’, or words to that effect. I may exaggerate a little but it’s possible for a new character to start as a porter and within weeks become a nurse or within two seasons a doctor at least, and old Charlie Fairhead (the highest paid actor on BBC TV) is more wooden every episode! The serials are good though, but when there are about three running at the same time, I might get a little confused.

Oh yes, Jeremy Clarkson. I have never forgiven him for joking about the demise of Rover, but Victor Meldrew, there was a man with the right attitude. I might even get to be a bit like him yet. I feel a lot better after getting that off my chest!

© Bob Garlick 2019